Roleplay
From The Ankyrean Archives
The strange and intangible pursuit of emoting pages and pages of overly verbose text instead of vivisecting newbies. Since it is rightly viewed as a disgusting habit, practitioners of this distasteful pursuit are shunned and spat upon by decent folk like you and me.
More specifically, roleplay involves pretending to be something you aren't, usually something with eighteen penises and and head-crushingly huge breasts. Technically it's compulsory in Aetolia, but as everyone knows this is propaganda spread by the filthy roleplaying scum.
Combat is heavily sought after in roleplay, as this allows bench-warming geeks to go blow-to-blow with musclebound, athletic warriors. The bizarre ritual of roleplay combat is carried out by taking turns emoting punches and kicks at the opposing participant. This aberration of battle operates on a fairness principle, leveling the playing field by eschewing the standard measurements of combat prowess, such as level, relative might, abilities, or actual training and skill. The tendency of the Gods to favor this method allows short-bearded, hairless manlings like Tamath to best gods such as Exodus or Xarian, using the "I Win" technique.
Ex:
| Nausikaa em 's fist crashes into your temple, causing the world around you to black out in an instant. |
| H:3260 M:4100 E:100% W:100% [csdb eb] |
| Nausikaa says, "I win motherfukcer.." |
| H:3260 M:4100 E:100% W:100% [csdb eb] |
I WIN MOTHERFUKCER..
How to Roleplay
- 1. Pick up any of the thirty or so cliche personalities.
- 2. Initiate RP (how you do so depends on the cliche you chose).
An example. I choose the cliche 'abused as a child'. Having assumed this role, I walk up to any Dick or Jane and initiate a conversation:
- Me: I was abused as a child.
- Dick/Jane: I don't give two shits, sorry.
Thus, you have fueled yourself for additional moping, which can be done at any of the following places:
- West Gate
- Four Corners At Nordau Street (Retarded road amirite?)
- Before the Needle of Balance
- North of Trees
- The Inner gate of Spinesreach
Simply 'POSE MISERY' and wait it out. Someone will ask, repeat the Dick/Jane conversation.
Advanced Roleplaying
Once you have mastered these methods (which is to true RP what bashing is to PK), you are ready to move on to the next level. This is accomplished through the use of emotes. As everyone knows, Aetolia is not a text-based game but a novel, and dominance (as well as penis size) are determined by the length and articulation of your emotes. They are your lifeline and method of communication, and if you misuse them, you will get fucked up.
Emotes should defy physics. Good emotes are always about unfing. Since we all know Freud was right, all RP boils down to unfing. Lots of unfing. Usually with daddy issues. Lots of daddy issues. What we're saying here is that the more gratingly grim'n'dark you are, the better you are at RPing. So slice your wrists open, use big words, write paragraphs upon paragraphs of unnecessary text, and wax fauxlosophical, and you're in good shape!
Very Popular Roles
- Emos.
Popular Roles
Other Roles
- Mass-murderers.
- Over-zealous Do-gooders (mass-murderers).
- 18-year-old Lycanthropes with a love of Jugular swipes and strangely advanced curing reflexes who suicide upon being outguilded.
- 100+-year-old, college-slang slinging PK Whores who "don't give a damn about anything or anyone, but if anyone messes with their family or friends, they'll seek vengenace!" Dur hur hurr
- RP Whores
- A character based on a real individual you have detailed information about.
 is part of a series on Aetolian jargon | |||||||||
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